I woke up one day and decided it may not be healthy to be bitter against all women

just because one classless lady did me wrong. It probably will help my career, because now

I’m a driven man. I’m driven by a dream, a small dream, one that makes me happier than

I am now: This girl that I fell in love with harder than anyone in the world, she was the

one who stole my heart. She told me she loved me and just a little while later turned her

back on me. Couldn’t even look me in the eye to tell me the truth. I envision my Utopia

where she’s pregnant far too young. Her fantasies of the perfect white picket house and

stable family dashed away by a single tailless sperm entering her infected uterus.

It damages every strand of self-esteem she once possessed. Forced to drop out and

find a disappointing 9-5 job, where her boss treats her like a slave and she’s reduced

to some lowly subservient employee with no health benefits or vacation days.

 

(Continue Reading...)

 She comes home every night to six kids infected with scurvy that look to their

mother merely to show their dissatisfaction for her parenting. They slaughter

domestic animals and bring them home and place them on their walls like trophy

animals. The family lives in a one-bedroom public housing complex with asbestos

seeping through the walls coupled with a sewage system that makes the Hudson

river look like the Atlantic Ocean. This girl will be stuck living in the most crime

ridden, savage infested city, with little recourse but a meaningless run of the mill life.

Stuck in a relationship with a 450 lb Behemoth, that does nothing but suck down

cheez-wiz, drink cheap beer and liquor and beats the kids every now and then.

Instead of providing for the kids with a real job, he steals raw meat out of the back

trucks at his job. Little does he know the meat he steals has traces of the Ebola virus.

But not all is tragic; she’s a vegetarian so she doesn’t eat this meat. But he does,

this obese rotten smelling troglodyte inhales his food as if it were his last meal.

Except it is. He gets on top of her and proceeds with the usual nasty painful to watch,

feel and experience, kind of sex. The black and white 12-inch television with antennas

covered in foil is playing in the background to nothing but vicious static. Static that

drowns out the incoherent grunts of the massive troglodyte. Once he’s about to

reach his orgasm, he pukes all over her face and chest, he begins projectile

vomiting blood above her head all over the television and walls behind her.

 

As she pushes his limp lifeless carcass off of her displeased body, she’s covered under

nearly a ton of fat, tainted blood and insides that have transformed into liquid fecal

matter. She is now covered in close to 300lbs. of rotten beer and infected stomach acids.

All the rodents that inhabit the home begin having frenzy of the flesh of this dead poor

excuse for a mammal. As she drags herself out of the abyss of prehistoric landfill, she

looks at the television that has cleared up from its static. As the puke subsides, she sees

my face on the idiot box, equipped with a best-selling book and a million-dollar smile.

 

It’s a good thing I’m not bitter…